Tapestry of Grace Co-op, First Year: How is it Going?

Several people have emailed me and asked after reading the blog posts about TOG, "How is the co-op going?" Rather than write a long response to each individual email, I will try to answer the question in a systematic way, based on our experiences to this point. (At the time I am writing this we are just over half-way through the year.) Hopefully our experiences as a group can help others as they begin their own journeys with TOG.

Our first field trip: A Lewis and Clark Hike

How We Started
We started as a conversation between three families who were attending Classical Conversations and had concluded that we did not want to continue there. (See Why the Switch?) We had a very high set of expectations, and wanted to continue with the good things that we had learned in CC, such as memory work, regular meeting times, and fellowship, but we wanted to craft something that was more to our style. All of us wanted to regain a very hands-on approach to the instruction of our own children, as well as have everything we studied be relevant to the spine of our studies.

All three families agreed that we would start with TOG Year 3, so we all ordered the print and DE editions. Over the course of the summer we prayerfully added two more families, and then at the midway point, one more family joined. Throughout the summer of 2011, we met together regularly and pored over the curriculum. The goals we set at first were very high, and would have required a certain amount of "reinventing the wheel," so we backed off those initial goals, though the core intention of the group remained the same. We ultimately concluded that the purpose of our group was to provide our kids with an opportunity to engage in discussions and projects that they would not otherwise have the chance to do if we only did the curriculum ourselves, in essense, we desired fellowship and accountability for ourselves and the kids. We also saw the great benefit of a quarterly "Unit Celebration" where the children present their work at the end of each quarter. We have had two and they have been so much fun! Field trips together is another fun thing that we try to do from time to time. We have had one per quarter so far.

being goofballs at the Unit Celebration

We have three groups of students - a lower grammar group (LG), which focuses on activities and craft projects that the younger kids enjoy, an upper grammar group (UG), which is a bit more focused on discussion of the reading, but also on projects and activities that are best done in a group setting, and finally a dialectic group (D) which is discussion based. That group discusses the history, literature and geography points of each week's study and does not engage as much in the hands-on projects. We meet on Monday Mornings from 9:30-1:00. We pack lunches and stay to play and fellowship after school work is done.

Evolution
Due to the fact that the location we had set as our meeting place was under its final stages of construction, we began the first weeks in one of our families' homes. It was really ideal in some ways, as they have the kind of house where we could spread out and do different activities in different places. However, from the outset we all agreed that we did not want to impose on any one family week after week--17 children plus moms is lot to host every week! It was wonderful in the fall, but we knew that the rainy and colder weather could really make for a more stressful situation if we continued to meet in a home.

Learning flag etiquette

Beginning with the second unit, we changed locations and began meeting in the new facility. There are pros and cons to this. The pros are that no family bears the burden of preparing to host each week. It is "neutral." The space that we are using is a large fellowship room in a church, with a sink and tile area where we can eat lunch or do messy crafts. There are also two classrooms off of the main area which are perfect for the UG and D students to hold their classes. The LG students meet in the large main room while the moms who are not leading discussions play with the toddlers and lend a hand to the LG group. It works. The cons are that the place is not as "homey" and we have to bring all of our stuff each week (envision the ubiquitous homeschooling-mom rolling crates crammed with books, notebooks and craft supplies!) All of us enjoy meeting in the space, though. It is a blessing to be there, to have the room for the kids to run around, and a sturdy place that cleans up easily after we are done. It has worked out well.

Field trip to hear Jim Weiss

We had another change in the second unit which caused a bit of upheaval, and that was the change of two of our UG students into the D level, by their own choice. One of these was my friend's 11 year old daughter, the other was my 10 year old son, both of whom were craving more reading and discussion than the UG track was providing. We moved them into the D group and made an interesting discovery--while they were absolutely thrilled with the D material and engaged readily and ably in the discussion, they are still at an age where they felt they were really missing out on the activities that the UG students were doing, so we had a dilemma. Also at week 18 we added one more family which brought us two more students, a D (age 11) girl and a LG (age 5) girl. The new girl was very much in the same mindset as our other young lady--she loves D discussion but wants to do activities too. The solution to this was to have the younger D students in the group for the literature discussion, then have them join the UG students for the project time. This is working out well, though they wish they could stay for the history discussion and still do the project! It's a good problem to have, really. We are amazed at how much the children are enjoying what they are learning!

Where Do We Go From Here?
We will begin Year 3, Unit 3, Week 22 on Tuesday. Because of the President's Day holiday, we decided that this would be a field trip week, so we are planning an outing for Friday. As things stand now, we will finish the year with the current configuration. Our UG mom who has done the bulk of the teaching is going to have a baby in a few weeks, so the other UG moms will fill in for her. Once we finish out the year, we will take a look at the things we feel have worked well and what has not worked as well and make changes based on our collective ideas. One struggle that the I have is that meeting in the morning digs into valuable time of instruction. It is simply human nature that once we get home from co-op, the day is shot. There is not the energy or the time to get math, grammar or writing done, so essentially we have four days a week to be sure that the core subjects get covered. Right now for my kids it is okay, but for my 10 year old, it is a squeeze. We have to be very disciplined those other four days. If we were to meet in the afternoons, as we do for our French class, we would still have five mornings a week, plus a comfortable two hours or more in an afternoon to have group discussions and do projects. This is the biggest struggle I personally face. As of yet, I cannot offer a solution, since the group has not discussed this as a whole. It will be interesting to see what next year brings. TOG has suggestions for how to run co-ops based on their curriculum. I see the value in meeting more often for older students, less often for younger. Nevertheless, this year has been so delightful as we have met together each week, and we have learned so much.

Assessment

Listening to a presentation on Gold Mining in VA

Our co-op has been a success, without a doubt. It has succeeded on many levels. The first area we have succeeded is in bringing like-minded families together to work on a curriculum together. This has provided much needed fellowship for parents, friendships for the kids, and accountability for us as teachers. I can honestly say that in this environment, I have never worked harder at homeschooling or with as much sense of purpose, nor have we ever covered so much material! It is truly amazing what the kids have learned. Further, we have had so much fun doing the hands-on projects, which for me, is a huge blessing! I am not a craft mom. In fact this is the one area that I constantly felt that I was falling short with my kids. At our co-op, however, we have engaged in some projects that all of the creative mom-minds have put together, and they have turned out great! We have had a Napoleonic Soldier's relay race, made salt-dough maps, sea-worthy rafts (think Swiss Family Robinson), Cherokee dioramas, clay pots, sewn bags of the sort that would have been used on the Oregon Trail, gone panning for gold, learned Chinese calligraphy, origami, kirigami...The list will go on, I'm sure, as we finish the year. These are only the things that just come to mind now. I know I'm forgetting some things.

Good fellowship at the Christmas party

Beyond anything academic that I can express, the Tapestry of Grace families are our friends. They are companions on this journey, and I love each of the moms so much--they have become some of my dearest friends, and the children are all wonderful--they are my kids' closest friends. We don't just see each other on Monday mornings. We go to the park, ice skate, get together for play dates, and just hang out with each other. We are so blessed.

I'm sure that each mom has her own thoughts and feelings about what she would like to see done differently, but as a group we have not sat down to evaluate those things yet. We are all content with things as they are and will consider any changes to come at the end of the year. I will be sure to update with any changes as they come!

Week 21: The Underground Railroad

This week was a good week, but both kids had the grumpies because of runny noses. Neither of them was bad enough to get out of school work, but they were sluggish. They graciously shared their stuff with me and now I have a stuffy nose, too.

At co-op we assembled care packages to distribute to homeless people in the area. One of the young ladies in our group chose to lead us all in this service project, which piggy-backed well on the story of Florence Nightengale.

It was a good week in which we focused on the Underground Railroad. Molly and I read several good stories, such as Follow the Drinking Gourd, and Barefoot and the story of Sojourner Truth. Matty began reading Freedom Train, which is a biography of Harriet Tubman.

Molly is soaring in her reading. I am so proud of her. The subject that used to bring us the most grief now regularly brings us great delight. She is also enjoying doing exercises on www.xtramath.org . She understands addition and subtraction fine, but needs to memorize the facts and build speed now. This program seems to be helping.

Matty did well with his work, but I felt it was like pulling teeth to get things done. We all have weeks like this, I know, but it was especially annoying this week. It seemed I was nagging him constantly to get his assignments done. I know this does not benefit him but merely drives both of us crazy. I was so frustrated by Wednesday, and on Thursday he had a 2:30 p.m. play date with a friend. I told him that the play date would be cancelled unless everything was checked off that he had been assigned. Interestingly, he was able to complete all of his school work that day by 2:00 p.m. He even worked through his lunch! (insert shocked smiley icon here.) I pointed out to him that he came up with his own plan to make sure he got all of his work done. He got up and executed the plan. Ha. Now I can hold him to the fact that I KNOW he is able to do this.

The struggles we had this week over planning and performance came as answers to prayer. I have been praying that God would show me where I need to train his character and to help me appreciate the good in him when his natural immaturity is driving me crazy. This post is the result of that.

In other news, I got new glasses. Yay! I can see the computer screen really well now!

Training A Boy in the Way

Training children to do what they are supposed to is very hard work, even when it appears to be very obvious to me as a parent. This week we had to work on the simple principle that, if you get up and get your independent work done first thing, then the rest of the school day goes faster and you get done earlier. Two days of school work dragging into the late afternoon and cries of "GRRR! I still have MATH to do!" finally got to him. On Thursday he was promised a play date with a favorite friend at 2:30, but ONLY if all school work was finished. Not surprisingly, he was blazing through his work and free at a little past 2:00. He took a deep breath and said, "Wow, it feels good to be done." Uh huh. Tell me about it. Why can't you do this every day?

It is not for lack of training. I sit down with him at the beginning of each week to fill out a daily goal chart, taken from a weekly assignment chart. He sets his own goals, determines how much reading he can do each day, and we write it down on his daily chart. At the end of each day he is supposed to look at the chart and check off what he got done. He is dismissed from lessons when all the boxes are checked. Simple, right? Why, then, at the end of the day, does he still come to me and say, "Am I done?" My reply is, "I don't know, look at your chart." This is usually met with an "Oh, Man! I still have...(heavy, miserable groan)"

I am hoping that the example of Thursday will continue to motivate him to be more efficient in the coming weeks. The reality is that gradually, his work load is becoming heavier, and he is responsible for more on his own. The difficulty is that he is extrinsically motivated and enjoys studying when it involves another person, hence the tendency to wait around for me to be available to tell him to do something, work on something with him or guide him. Even at age 10, he still desires this, though I know he is capable of doing it without me. Meanwhile, his 6 year old sister needs increasing amounts of my time as she is developing into a wonderful little student, but is still not independent as a reader.

But this is the essence of home schooling is it not? We need to be able to train our children to work to their potential within the personal traits they are given. While being extroverted and extrinsically motivated is not a flaw in itself, it tends to increase a person's dependency on others to get things done. In a group setting, my son often is at the head of the pack--gregarious and funny and very effective as a leader. This is a wonderful quality, but I need to train him to lead himself in the things that do not bring as much pleasure.

I have pondered Proverbs 22:6 often in the course of raising my children. It says,

"Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it. (NIV 1984)"

Where is the emphasis meant to be in this verse...in training, in the way he should go, or the not turning away? Is this simply a promise for solid parenting or a directive to parents to determine what "the way" is? I think a lot of parents take this rather simply, as in "teach your child to be a good Christian and he'll always be one." (I hear a gong sounding in the distance). What I am coming to understand is that this is a dynamic, moment by moment issue that parents must tend to constantly. My child's character and personality is largely formed by age five, according to psychologists. This means that he / she and I have a certain set of personality traits and qualities with which to work. My job as a parent is to discipline those God-given traits into something that is useable to glorify God, if in fact man's chief aim is to glorify God (I happen to believe that it is). I need to be watching daily, gently and lovingly guiding those traits as I see them arise--praising the appropriate expressions of these gifts, correcting abuses of them. If my son is given a personality that loves to lead others and be in groups of people, then I need to teach him how to stock his mind and heart with good things that will flow outward to benefit those around him. Even more I must help him understand that as an outgoing fellow, people will better respond to him when he has a store of valuable things to share. This is motivation for him. Then study and time spent alone is a means to an end, not a time to be lonely.

I believe that "training a child in the way he should go" means that I pray for discernment, study and know my child in the most loving way possible, and bring out in him the best of his best qualities, at the same time teaching and modeling for him faithfulness to God. This, he will not part from when he is old...

Wordless Wednesday: Fun With the iPad

Week 20: Big Strides for A Little Girl!

We had another great week. The war on our "Worst Homeschool Enemies" has continued, and now is becoming more standard protocol. Messages are taken by the trusty voice mail, I've been trying to get to bed earlier, and sticking to my guns and making sure the check-list gets "checked" is going well.

The kids enjoyed week 20's geography, this week, as they traced maps of Asia and learned about China, Japan, and Russia's boundaries and features. They also reviewed things they had learned in last year's CC cycle and remembered where all the "stans" are.

We finished Tom Sawyer and began listening to Little Women which, to my utter astonishment, my son is enjoying! We read about and discussed Hudson Taylor, missionary to China, and Florence Nightengale, the mother of modern nursing. We have also enjoyed discussions about Commodore Perry and the opening of Japan. This has led to some interesting discussions in our family about whether or not the US oversteps its boundaries in foreign policy. It's interesting to see our son begin to form opinions about this.

Molly, sporting her new glasses!

I have lately been a bit concerned about my sweet girl's reading. She seemed to be struggling still with sounding things out, still faltering sometimes over words, then began reversing all of her numbers consistently. I was thinking "uh-oh, is this dyslexia?" My first thing was to get her eyes checked. I put it off for a couple of weeks, then decided I must. If it wasn't her eyes, I'd make and appointment with a specialist. The day I called to make the appointment was the day I think her reading "lightbulb" got switched on! She suddenly seemed to be soaring--blowing through her reading lessons, writing her numbers correctly, enjoying school even more, and excelling in general. For the last two weeks, she has been so thrilled with the ease with which she is reading, and looks forward to her reading text as one of her favorite parts of lessons, not the hardest thing anymore. ((sigh)) We went ahead and got her glasses, but at least I am pretty sure that the problem she was having is not dyslexia or a learning disability.

Overall it was a great week. We wrapped it up with ice skating on Thursday and play dates with friends on Friday, while mom and dad got some errands done (and a little date in the process.)

Week 19: Holy Smokin' Homeschool, Batman!

Monday, which is Day One on the War Against Our Worst Enemies:

Today we were a homeschooling machine. My kids, thankfully, were willing--er--what would they be if we were a machine--ah yes, cogs, though not necessarily well-oiled.

We started the day with Bible. We have slowly been picking through the book of Matthew and we will keep reading until we have read through the whole New Testament. The kids worked on their daily origami and kirigami calendars while I read the Bible and the Tapestry of Grace intro to the unit and week (Year 3, unit 3, week 1). We discussed the reading, which was about the signs of the end of the age (Matthew 24) which stimulated conversation. Both kids were very curious about this topic, which up to now I have not discussed at length with them. After that we introduced the week's geography, and filled in our maps.

After Geography, Matty worked on his math while I worked with Molly on her math and language lessons. I can't say he was efficient. It took him about three times longer than it needed to between stopping to check out what we were doing, waiting around to get a question answered without telling me he had one, complaining that his work was taking way too long (because he was doing the above)...anyway, he got through it. I'm sure your children never do these things.

Molly cheerfully did her reading, copy work, writing, grammar and math. Even though she understands the concept of subtraction and has for a while, she began working the subtraction problems today in Math-U-See (Alpha, lesson 18).

Over lunch we listened to two more chapters of Tom Sawyer.

After lunch, Matty completed two days' work in Writing With Ease and also in First Language Lessons. He has set his goals for the week and will start the reading for the week this evening.

I love a productive day. The success in the "war on homeschool's enemies" came from getting the kids up by 7:30 and having breakfast done by 8:30. I was not successful at getting to bed at a decent hour--more like midnight--but I forced myself up this morning to force an earlier bedtime tonight. I was successful at not answering the phone--but then again no one called! Okay, check that box but it's kind of cheating...

Tomorrow morning we have a Dr. appointment which has the potential to throw the day all out of whack, but hopefully the extra work we did today will mean that we can have a reading day tomorrow and go lighter on the seat-work stuff.

Tuesday, Which is Day Two...

Beautiful! In every way today was beautiful!

Math was done before breakfast, then we ate a hearty meal, went to an eye doctor appointment, listened to Tom Sawyer over car-rides and lunch, had a reading lesson for Miss Molly and additional geography lessons on Asia for both kids (by request). We collectively agreed to bag French class in favor of playing outside in the near-70 degree weather, and spent the entire afternoon at the park. We all came home happy, tired, hungry, and very dirty. Steaks on the grill and salad for dinner. Continued reading aloud Commodore Perry in the Land of the Shogun, which is very interesting. Should be able to make an early bedtime tonight.

Wednesday, Which is Day Three...

Earlier to bed last night, up again by 7:00. Piano lessons at 10:00 this morning, followed by a quick stop at the library to pick up books on hold, grabbed lunch at Subway, and crammed in an hour of schoolwork before heading out to play. again. Between every destination and over lunch we listened to more of Tom Sawyer. I think I have fallen in love with that boy (again). If I were Becky Thatcher, I would find him just as irresistible. Today was another unseasonably warm day, making it impossible to resist the urge to have a re-do of yesterday. Even more friends turned out at the park today, and the kids had a wonderful afternoon running and playing with friends whilst the mothers sat on the quilt and planned all sorts of interesting things for them to do, such as a Victorian Tea Party for Valentine's Day.

AWANA tonight for the kids. Mom's quiet night at home. I'm thinking a hot bath sounds really nice...

Thursday, Which is Day Four...

By Thursdays I am typically starting to run out of steam and today was no different. Besides being stiff from running around and playing football at the park with my kids the past two days, I was just plain tired all day. Even so, I made blueberry muffins for breakfast and homemade chicken noodle soup for lunch / dinner (to go with the leftover muffins), and we listened to a lot of Tom Sawyer. Every time a pause in the story would occur, cries of "NO! Don't turn it off!" would result in yet another chapter. We're nearing the end of the story.

We also managed to get some writing done (Writing With Ease), as well as a rousing game of "I Spy" that was part of Molly's reading lesson in Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading (OPGTR). Molly and I read the book Emily by Michael Bedard as part of her TOG literature lesson.

Finally, I worked with Matty on his sewing project that needed to be completed for the  Unit 2 Celebration which will occur on Saturday. It is a "possibles bag" as was discussed in both Moccasin Trail and Bound for Oregon, which were part of Unit 2's reading. Since I am not what I would call a seamstress, but possess only basic sewing skills, it has been fun to learn along with him how to construct a bag that he can carry his survival gear in, complete with an inside pocket.

By 6:00 p.m. I was gathering my things and departing for my weekly Thursday evening out. It's always worth it to show up--God shows up, and I like to be in places where he is present and demonstrating his faithfulness. (If you follow this link the reference is near the end of the blog entry)

Tomorrow is Friday, which is Day Five...
We will be going to a gold mining camp about an hour away to learn about, well, gold. We have been studying the California gold rush, and it turns out that Virginia was the first gold-producing state in the union. We are going on a tour of a park and will get to do a little panning on the field trip. I'm looking forward to it! I'm sure there will be photos coming!

As for the "War on our Enemies," I have been very good about the phone this week, and I have been getting to bed a little earlier, though not quite as early as I'd like. I'll continue to work on this. Even so, this day-by-day entry into my blog of the week's accomplishments has given me great satisfaction and held me accountable to really working on these areas that needed some discipline. I hope you have enjoyed this glimpse into the week we have had. Happy Friday, Everyone!