How do I Know What I Think Unless I Write?

I write to know what I think. If you happen to read it too, that is fine with me, but ultimately I write for myself. For a long time this blog was the outlet I needed to process what was happening in the educational journey of my family, as well as to  encourage fellow sojourners in home education. Then the phrase, "Mom, don't you dare post about that" was heard more and more from my children who were entering adolescence, and I understood that they didn't necessarily want their lives splashed across the internet. As much as I hated to do it, I discontinued publishing new content on that blog, and entered a desert season as a writer that has endured for several years until now.

But now, both of my children are entering adulthood, and I find myself wondering what I want to do when I am done with this homeschooling life. The truth is, my desire to write has never wavered but I have struggled to find the courage to begin again.

Fear is a dreadful thief of inspiration, and I have somehow allowed it to creep in and deter me from being what I desire most to be. Fear of not having something to say, fear of what others will think, fear of the unknown are just a few of the little foxes spoiling this vine. Courage is action despite the presence of fear, and today I have decided that someday, having to explain why I didn't do what I was meant to do all along is worse than all the other fears combined. Courage is the only course. I must just start, and if I fall, I fall. If nothing comes of it, then so be it. On the other hand, if I never start, nothing will surely be the result by default. I don't want to take that risk. A failed effort is one thing, an effort never begun is a failure indeed.